It isn’t a straight and narrow path

 This path that I’m on isn’t one that is easy to follow. It isn’t a paved road. 

It is a path filled with valleys and hills, holes and ruts, scenic views and so much more.

Right now, it is in more of a valley. My depression has been activated the past few days and I’m trying to stay ahead and do the things that I need to do.

Almost all of the plans I’ve tried to make have fallen apart.

This would be a great place to say F IT and go back to living in the dark and pretending. A place where I could stop trying to learn more, stop ascending my ways of thought.

But I continue on. I’m so tired of being on the struggle bus, but I refuse to stand still.

I’m still trying to figure out my dreams. Honestly, I haven’t put the time and effort into figuring them out. It is one of the many things on my to do list. It is easier to do nothing at times or make myself so busy that I “forget” or can’t get to the important work of self.

One of the dreams I started on was one that involves traveling more for work. I also thought of doing some motivational speaking. I see so much potential in our youth, yet they seem to get so lost and focused on fitting in instead of standing out. I wish they could see that there is such a huge world outside of these small towns. 

I want the world to stop thinking the only path to success is on the backs of others.  That we can all do better if we would just learn to support one another instead of tearing each other apart.  

And maybe that is why everything is so sad to me right now. Because the world is so full of hate and people/businesses pushing harder and higher on the backs of so many regular humans. 

So, while I’m in this valley, I’m going to take a few to pause and see the foliage that grows where the sun doesn’t shine the brightest. To take a moment and live like a mushroom. 

Be well. Treat yourself with some grace and understanding. 

Now, take a deep breath and keep on keeping on.